Nick visits Fairfax Hospital on his never ending tour of medical facilities…

     So here we are, almost two years into the “new normal”.  By all accounts, one would agree that the Cafferky family has weathered the storm, and that we are getting acclimated to the new climate of our lives.  Yet, each day brings new challenges, and to continue the weather metaphor, there will always be storms and uncomfortable conditions that  remind us that we don’t live in a place like San Diego, but rather, more like upstate New York or Minnesota.  No offense to natives of those regions, it is just fact that a geography that considers their four seasons as “June, July, August and winter”, does not exude feelings of constant comfort, easy travel and spontaneous outdoor activities.  That is kind of like what our “new normal” life is like:  dressing properly for varying conditions, having the right equipment to cope with unpredictable weather and difficult terrain or knowing when to concede to the environment and seek assistance or just stay home.     Try to imagine how difficult it is for a young man who has always been strong, athletic and courageous (or stupid – often the same thing) to find himself in this body that will not work with him.  Quadriplegia isn’t just being paralyzed; it is being trapped inside of a body that will not respond to orders and does not provide warnings of conditions that could be, best case, embarrassing, and worst case, life threatening.  Nick has handled the embarrassing things with a sense of humor and God-given grace that has eased this situation for us all.  However, Nick is not necessarily vigilant when it comes to being proactive with respect to injuries, complications or symptoms that should be explored.  Of course he hasn’t!  For his entire life, he has had that “shake it off” attitude – whether he was hit by a baseball or had his mug popped by Mike Sarson (old story – ask Nick about it – I think the video is on YouTube somewhere.)  Now, however, he, and we, MUST be aware of every single mark on his body, bump or scratch because when you have no sensation, you have no warning system.  I used to think it would be almost good to have no feeling in my body – life without chronic pain would be awesome.  But, without pain or discomfort, we will usually miss symptoms that, when left untreated, could be quite dangerous.     About six weeks ago, while we were in Blacksburg, Nick got a blister on the bottom of his right foot.  It didn’t seem like a big deal at the time, and we did the bandaid/Neosporin thing.  It started to heal (or so we thought), so we didn’t really worry about it.  However, last week, while cleaning the sore and dressing it, Mike saw that it had become an ugly wound, inflaming his whole foot and looking like it was getting worse.  So – Mike made an appointment to have a doctor look at it.  Net/net:  When our beloved Dr. Haggerty saw it, she immediately took action to treat it as a serious symptom.  In a healthy person, by the time a wound could get this infected, it would be so painful there would be no way a person could go without treatment.  However, with no sensation below his chest, and no ability to even look at the bottom of his own foot, Nick couldn’t know that this was starting to fester.  So Dr. Haggerty got Nick checked into Fairfax Hospital [Sidebar:  We had to wait 4 hours for a room, but it was worth it b/c we got a private room with two beds, woohoo!]     Truth be told, I totally lost it when they called me to tell me that Nick had to be admitted.  I’m sure you all can appreciate my disdain for hospitals and all of the uncomfortable feelings that come rushing through my entire self when I think about my young man, once again, in a hospital bed.  But, thank you Dana – who helped me keep it together to wrap up my work and go meet the family, and thanks to Nick for being his usual “this ain’t nothin’ but a thang” attitude.  I mean, all he was upset about was having to miss the Caps game.  [Sidebar:  if you all know how that worked out, it’s probably good that he and his friends weren’t watching the game at our house or they may have trashed the place or started drinking – both unacceptable actitivies!]     So now, I am at home with Brendan while Mike hangs out with Nick at the hospital.  This morning, a specialist told us that Nick dodged a bullet and this was caught before anything really bad happened.  For that, we thank Dad and Praise God.  He will be on the extreme antibiotic therapy for at least another 48 hours, but we are hopeful he will be able to come home on Saturday.  And, we really are pros at this hospital stuff, so it hasn’t been as traumatic as it used to be.     I would like to share more about my personal feelings about all of this, but there is no time now.  However, I just know that, for the rest of Nick’s life, he (and we) will have to remain vigilant in his care.  We have to recognize limitations and know when to seek medical assistance or take a rest or whatever.  As I said at the beginning, we are adjusting to a new climate in Nick’s life.  Every once in a while, I get so sad that my boy’s life will be so much harder than it could have been.  I also struggle with feelings of guilt (are we doing enough? are we vigilant and aware? Are we too lazy?) and fear of the future.  And then, of course, there is the insidious bouts of self pity – the “Why us?”  “Why can’t it be me and not Nick”  “What did we do to deserve this” and the worst one “I just can’t take it anymore”.  But today is not the day to delve into my fears and depression.  Today, I am glad that Nick is OK, our family has a plan to deal with the current crisis, and, as always, God will get us through it all.  As Bob Dylan and my friend KimE says:  We don’t need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.     I just wanted to let you all know what was going on.  Nick will be fine and he continues to respond to the antibiotics.  Please pray that he continues to heal, his nurses stay competent and pretty and wise, and that his doctors are really paying attention to Nick’s wound as well as Nick as a person.  Also please pray that Mike and my work is not negatively impacted and that we don’t drop any balls regarding Brendan’s needs and other family and friend obligations.  Trust me – we would much rather be helping others than being the perpetual family charity case.  But, as always, we appreciate your prayers and all of the kindnesses you continue to provide to our family.  The Cafferky family continues to keep on keepin’ on.  God be praised.     Just a quick side note:  Many thanks to KellyC., DianeP., CristyR. and DanaN for planning the big fun Cinco de Mayo Tech people reunion party last week that doubled as a fund raiser for Nick.  I am always so amazed at the generosity and love that so many quality people share with us.  It is pretty comforting to know that we are loved and that our family has such an extended family in our community, in our workplace, in our industry and among all of our old and new friends.  Thanks to all who contributed, and I give it an 80% chance that at least some will get thank you notes!      Thanks for following along.  I will keep you all posted.  Meanwhile, we will have mini-updates on my, Mike’s, Brendan’s and/or Nick’s facebook status’.  If you have “friended” any of us, you will get scoop.     May you all enjoy the blessings and grace that my Lord continues to shower over us all.  Our cup indeed overflows.Shalom!   Nick’s Mom